Final Draft

Editing

24/01/2017

As you can see on the right, Ed and I continued to struggle with adjusting the sound to make it more bearable and easier to understand. 

I searched for a YouTube tutorial to help me understand how to adjust volume and background noise. This however, was only successful to an extent and unfortunately, we ran out of time to further the improvements. We will have to revisit this at a later date to update the next draft.

A suggestion has been that we should just re-record the sound, however, we will have to have different voice actors to the actors present in the opening sequence which means that the sound may not match the qualities of the actors. 

Third Draft

Editing

23/01/2017

Ed and I spent much of today  fixing the sound as far as possible as it did not match up in  specific locations. I spent the first hour and a half refining anything Ed did not do in the previous edit. This included:

Reading through the list that I made in the previous post, and finishing the English Subtitles as well as re-ordering some captions and where they came in.

I also replaced the 'tracks' shot with one that included more trees as well as a richer colour as Ed and I both agreed that the previous 'tracks shot' was in too blue a colouration.

Sound

I've decided to make yet another post on sound because sound seems to play such an important role in creating an atmosphere in a thriller, something which I personally do not think our opening sequence possesses. To help this, I gathered some sound clips that can be used in various ways. For an example, a crescendo can be used for when Tony B takes out the phone from his pocket which could build a suspense in the audience over whether the item is perhaps a weapon, or indeed a phone.

Second Draft

Although this post is entitled 'Final Edit', Ed and I plan on improving our opening sequence further tomorrow. I am rather thankful as the opening sequence is only available due to Ed's major part in the editing process as a result of me taking leave for illness, however, we both exchanged words via mobile phone which allowed us to collaborate to some extent. What we have is below:

I am aware that there are many improvements which could be made, therefore, we will make them tomorrow on Monday. The following are the points which I gathered.

1. Establishing shot is slowed down
2. 'A' is not centre
3. Second shot is slowed down and in bad colour
4. Credits are too big
5. The long shot which I took is wonky
6. 'Kin' is not centre
7. There is a freeze frame when Ed stops
8. The two shot which I took is also wonky
9. Music cuts off at right time but there's a big change in sound
10. Shot order in the middle part is rather odd
11. Fist shot is too long
12. There isn't any interesting sound in the background at this point
13. Sound in the dialogue exchange should be fixed
14. Could there be a sound bridge from 'Some time later'?
15. MAKE ALL CREDITS SMALLER, perhaps align them with certain objects

Voice Recording

It became my task to record my own father's dialogue for the voice message which his character (Ivan's father) leaves for Ivan. The results are as follows:

As you may notice, My father actually decided to improvise a few of his lines to make the grammar and language fit into his role. Below is the improvised script my father helped to produce as his knowledge of the Hungarian language is far better than my own:

"Édes fiam, a te kezedbe adom az életem munkáját, olyan dolgok miatt amikrȍl nem beszélhetek. Így hát a munkát neked kell befejzni, úgy ahogy jónak látod, rád van bízva! Itt hagyom neked rá a pénzt az ágyam alatt a bȍröndben. A falban megtalálod a dobozt is. De ami a legfontosabb, mostantól te vagy a bandának a feje. Végeztem! Fiam csak még annyit, szeretnék büszke lenni rád."

Despite the Hungarian changing, the English is very much the same, therefore, when Ed and I insert the translation for this speech, we will keep the original one which I had originally written the script for.

Editing

17/01/2017

During this session of editing, Ed and I were trying to perfect visual mistakes we made. We will move onto sound during the next editing session since we thought that the visuals were probably the most important aspect to get correct the first time.

Filming

14/01/2017

This filming day went particularly well because Ed and I knew exactly what we were doing due to our improvement in terms of organisation. Our two actors were also very helpful in making the filming experience as quick as possible so we actually finished two hours before the intended time, including any other necessary re-films to have perfect weather continuity in this piece. 

As well as this, Ed and I made sure to take several variations of each shot (sometimes up to six so that any camera mistakes are eliminated and we are able to cut frames together if need be. Below is a picture of our filming.

Ed filming the scene where Tony B takes out the
phone from his pocket.

The History of Thrillers

To maintain a focus on the thriller genre before Ed and I complete the filming tomorrow, I decided to create a quick research post about the history and nature of thrillers. I produced a presentation here on a website called Padlet:

Final Script

This is the final script for the main action which I took responsibility for TYPING UP while we both  worked together to improve what Ed initially constructed as a skeleton script. Just click on the link to visit the website to see the flip book which I created using a PDF version of the word document on which the script was written, and a software called 'Flipping Book'.

https://online.flippingbook.com/view/61045

Alternatively, you can read the script below if the link above does not function correctly:

*You must note, that the edits and cuts were not included as Ed and I still have yet to figure those out and when it comes to filming, it will rather be a question of what suits the actors role than any planned edit.*

‘KIN’

BY

EDWARD BARKER/ CSENGE NEMETI

FADE IN:

EXT. SIDINGS – DAY

Large, urban area with jarring imagery of nature and industrial, processed elements.

IVAN approaches the two hooded figures – TONY A and TONY B

IVAN

(Shifty and awkwardly laughs
in an attempt to make light of the
subject) Fancy seeing you two here

The characters experience an awkward silence here and thus IVAN moves on to explaining the character’s roles etc.

- INTERCUT TONY A BIO –

IVAN

TONY A likes killing people and
is essentially a hit
man, but rather the hit or miss
sort.

- CUT TO SIDINGS SCENE –

IVAN

So... I guess you work for me now?

TONY B

No, we worked for your dad. (Puts
 emphasis on ‘worked’) Except I don’t
know if you noticed, but your dad’s
not around anymore.

- INTERCUT TONY B BIO –

IVAN

TONY B, well he also likes to
kill, but there’s a difference
in the fact that he’s not trigger
happy.

- CUT TO SIDINGS SCENE –

IVAN

Well I figured, with dad gone...
I’m the new head?

TONY B

Well you figured wrong kid...

TONY A

(Interrupting TONY B)Just go back
home to that mum of yours.
(Both snigger and laugh at the
implied sexual innuendo)How is
she now a days anyway?

IVAN

(addressing TONY B)... What did
you call me here for TONY?

TONY B

This (throws mobile phone).

TONY A

He told us to give it to you
in case he was ever... busy.

TONY B

He said to check your voice-
mail.

TONY A

Run along kid.

- STRAIGHT CUT TO VOICEMAIL SCENE -

Updated Storyboard

Storyboard 2

Ed and I have discussed the plans for a new and updated storyboard so that this time during filming, we will be able to keep to it in a more thorough and more accurate fashion. I drew up the storyboard using a software called 'Gimp' (very similar to 'Photoshop') and a graphics tablet, while Ed and I discussed what the captions should be. We came out with this outcome at the time of positing:

As you can probably conclude yourself, drawing up the storyboard digitally means that we are able to make quick fixes, move windows around and generally edit anything we don't like or want to change. This means that, in order to keep a clean and ordered storyboard, we don't have to re-draw it every time while we continue to develop it.

Skeleton Script

*AS ED ORIGINALLY WROTE IN HIS BLOG (credit to Ed for this post):

"Below is the 'skeleton script' Ed created for our opening sequence for 'Kin'. He initially made this script to serve as a basic idea of what the dialogue should resemble and how the characters in the scene should be portrayed. Ed and I later analysed the script in order to identify any improvements that could be made. On the picture below you can notice the prurple annotations Ed and I added to improve the script."

I will type up the improved script in a fashion which resembles a professionally written one. This will be included in an up-coming post.

Actors (New)

Ed and I decided to recruit new actors to play Tony A and Tony B. They are ideal as their appearances match the profile which Ed and I are looking for; middle aged, stern looking. We need a significant looking age gap between Ivan and his peers as to create the correct affect of tension between the ages.